The English Abroad
This poem was written for our pub poetry group at The Barking Dog. The theme, with it being held on St George's Day, was England/The English. I hope you enjoy reading it!
The English Abroad
(An ode to Flanders and Swann)
The English are best.
The English are best.
The English are coming; we're impeccable guests.
All of the others are rude, foreign pests.
The English, the English, the English are best.
The lads are on tour
And it’s the girls’ big weekender
And dad and his golf mates are off on a bender.
The English are best.
The English are best.
We're off on our jollies, in need of a rest.
Sun, beer and sex is our only request.
The English, the English, the English are best.
We’re off on a plane
to your unspoilt land
and we'll speak LOUDLY and
S-L-O-W-L-Y
SO YOU'LL UNDERSTAND.
THE ENGLISH ARE BEST.
THE ENGLISH ARE BEST.
On holiday, we're always impeccably dressed.
We'll turn up at the restaurant in flip-flops and a vest.
The English, the English, the English are best.
Tonight, we’ll soak up the culture
At Davey’s night club
And a full breakfast tomorrow at the Lamb and Flag pub.
The English are best.
The English are best.
We'll mention the war, but that's only in jest.
Our jokes are quite nuanced; that's why you're not impressed.
The English, the English, the English are best.
We’ll try your best restaurants
But we are in a hurry.
We don’t want that foreign muck though; give us chips and a curry.
The English are best.
The English are best.
The English,
The English,
The English are best.
You're the worst.
We're the first.
We're the best
of the best.
The English, the English,
It's tattooed on our chest;
The English, The English, The English, The English,
The English, The English,
The English, The English,
The English, The English, The English, The English,
The English, The English, The English, The English,
THE ENGLISH, THE ENGLISH,
THE ENGLISH, THE ENGLISH,
THE ENGLISH, THE ENGLISH,
THE ENGLISH, THE ENGLISH,
THE ENGLISH,
THE ENGLISH,
THE ENGLISH
ARE
BEST
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